The Four Agreements Book Summary/Notes

All of our beliefs and rules stem from a system that we never chose.

This domestication process takes place as soon as we are born until we no longer need the guidance from our parents to further confirm our book of law/beliefs.

Even when we know certain parts of it are wrong, they feel safe and we hold on to them, which is why it’s so difficult to make meaningful changes.

We are the only species that pays a thousand times for the same mistake. True justice is paying only once for each mistake, yet due to our memory we constantly remember and overthink and punish ourselves.

Outside and inside world is ruled by fear due to our book of law of beliefs.

We all search for truth because we only believe in the lies we have stored in our mind.

Truth is within us. Our beliefs cloud our vision of seeing the truth.

It’s like a fog, the Toltecs call It mitote, where the fog is so big that we cant see what we really are. In India they call it maya, meaning illusion.

Our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive and to express what we really are. We’ve learned to Live our lives trying to satisfy other peoples demands. We have learned to live by other people‘s points of view because of the fear of not being accepted and not being good enough for someone else.

During the process of domestication we form an image of what perfection is in order to try to be good enough, creating an image of how we should be in order to be accepted by everybody.

We don’t fit this image because it’s not real, leading us to rejecting ourselves. We wear social masks to keep others from noticing this.

We punish ourselves endlessly for not being what we believe we should be, all from this flawed belief system.

The more self love you have the less you will abuse yourself.

All of our views and beliefs are agreements that we’ve made with ourself. To live a life of joy and fulfillment you must find the courage to break the agreements that are fear based so you can claim your personal power.

All of our agreements rule our life and build our personality.

By eliminating them, we spend less time and energy focusing on them, leaving us with more time and energy for changing our ways for positive outcome.

1st agreement

Be impeccable with your word

Words are everything

You express your creative power, and manifest everything through It

Dreams, feelings and who you are

You have the ability to use It for good and to help yourself and others, or use It destructively. Your level of self love is directly proportionate to the quality and integrity of your word.

Whenever we hear an opinion and believe it we make an agreement and it becomes part of our belief system.

Gossiping is black magic, poison, a way for us to feel better by seeing someone else feel as badly as we do.

Impeccability of the word can lead you to personal freedom success and abundance, It can take away all fear and transform it into joy and love.

By controlling our emotions, we can gain the necessary personal power essential to change our fear based agreements.

2nd agreement

Don’t take anything personally

Personal importance, taking things personally, is the maximum expression of selfishness because we make the assumption that everything is about me. During the period of our education or our domestication we learn to take everything personally we think we are responsible for everything.

Nothing other people do is because of you. It’s because of themselves. All people live in their own dream in their own mind, they are in a completely different world from the one we live in.

When we take something personally we make the assumption that they know what is in our world and we try to impose our world on there’s.

Even when a situation seems so personal even if others insult you directly it has nothing to do with you. What they say what they do and the opinions they give are according to the agreements they have in their own minds. Their point of view comes from all the programming they received during domestication.

Everyone has their own opinion according to their belief system so nothing they think about you is really about you, it is about them.

You can completely avoid negative emotions by making It a strong habit to not take anything personally.

As you make a habit of not taking anything personally, you won’t need to place your trust in what others do or say. You will only need to trust yourself to make responsible choices.

You are never responsible for the actions of others, you are only responsible for you. When you truly understand this and refuse to take things personally, you can hardly be hurt by the careless comments or actions of others.

3rd agreement

Don’t make assumptions

When we make assumptions, we believe they are the truth.

This leads to misunderstanding and taking things personal, as we defend our assumptions and try to make others wrong.

It is always better to ask questions then to make an assumption because assumptions set us up for suffering.

We only see what we want to see and hear what we want to hear, we don’t perceive things the way they are.

Because we don’t understand something we make an assumption about the meaning and when the truth comes out we find out it was not what we thought it was at all.

The mind constantly seeks to justify everything regardless if the answer is correct, which is why we make assumptions.

Keep yourself from making assumptions by asking questions and keeping communication clear so that you do not need to assume anything because you would then know the truth. Even then don’t assume you know all there is to know about a given situation.

4th agreement

Always do your best

By not trying to do more (depleting energy) or less (resulting in frustration) than your best, you reach a happy medium that can help you from judging yourself.

Your best will change over time and based on the situations and environments that you’re in.

By doing your best, you live intensely. You’re productive, good to yourself and helpful to others. Doing your best is taking the action because you love It, not because you’re expecting a reward.

Most of us do the opposite, resulting in not doing our best.

If you take action without expecting a reward, they will come naturally and in much more abundance than you would’ve imagined.

By taking action you express yourself.

By living in the present and letting go of the past or thoughts of the future, you can be fully alive in the moment.

Letting go of the past means you can enjoy the dream that is happening right now.

Living in the past means always wishing things to be different, living half alive and leading to suffering and self pity.

The first three agreements will only work if you do your best, you cant expect to always be impeccable with your word not take anything personally or never make another assumption, but you can always try your best.

If you do your best always over and over again you will become a master of transformation. Practice makes the master. By doing your best you become a master.

Three masteries to become a Toltec

Mastery of awareness

Aware of who you really are, with all the possibilities.

Mastery of transformation

How to change and be free of domestication.

Mastery of intent/love

What makes transformation of energy possible. It is life itself, unconditional love.

Art of transformation – develop awareness of all the self limiting fear based beliefs that make you unhappy. Changing them and reprogramming your mind by exploring and adopting alternative beliefs.

We are addicted to our ways and beliefs. But just as we built them over years of repetition, we can break them and replace them with new agreements.

Initiation of the dead

By being aware that life isn’t guaranteed and that we only have this present moment, we can discover and realize that it’s a waste of time to worry about what others think and to not be happy and do what we enjoy.